Nightmares

Rupey and all,

Yes, I admit. I'm a failure of a leader! What am I doing? In my dreams I am overrun by spiders. I am attacked by hideous, black arachnids!!! I am caught in their webs and slowly sucked dry!

Where have I lead our great nation? The Republic of Tinselman has truly gone to hell in a handbasket this time (oh, I love that phrase)!!! Yes, Rupey, perhaps you've always been right... we are lost! Only Angelina stands beside me (perhaps because we've both been through the whole Hollywood thing).

But will she stay with me, at the end? Will her soft voice whisper in my ear as the spiders attack? Or will she run into the warm arms of Wilmey? Or to you, Rupey?

And now! Even now! I hear the marching hordes of the Museum of Dust, moving down the tunnel behind us! Arm yourselves! It seems my worst nightmares are about to become true!!!

Comments

[Adam Wilmer]

(said in a John Rhys-Davies/Gimli voice:) "That's it! If we are to see the end of this great Republic, then I will take as many Dusters with me as possible!"

Jumping forward, I brandish my axe (yes i have one) and strike!

"One ring to rule them all!!!"

[President Rupert]

Come to Rupey, dear little spiders!

Kill the dwarf! Now the trekkie!

Now follow me, my evil arachnids, onward to the R.O.T., from where we shall rule the blogosphere.

[Danxia]

Help, I'm still stuck in the Trompe Room!

Hang on, perhaps I'm safer here . . .

[Alli]

Ok, Rupey's lost it.

Unfortunately Cap'n Shat, the prisoner passed out before indie and I could get anything out of him.

Spiders. I hate spiders. Now where are my Special Deluxe Ronin Energy-Shot-Rifle-Guns?

[Adam Wilmer]

Alli here...

*I toss you a P90*

It's the best I have...

[Alli]

Thanks Wilmey

*I jump into the fray of spiders*

GYAAAAHHHHHH!!!!! Die, you nasty spiders! DUST will never rule Tinselman!!!!!

[President Rupert]

You think I've lost it??!!

I'm not the one who plays shoot-em'up all day long (for days on end) in some far flung corner of space.

Neither would I lead my citizens on such a fool's errand. (Unlike some).

We are TINSELFOLK, people. We build palaces, we keep sea-serpents.

We belong in the Republic of Tinselman . . . to hell (in a handbasket!) with finding the Khan! I'm going home!

[Angelina]

I'm going with Rupey!

[President Rupert]

Friends,

I write to you from my office at the summit Mt. St. Tinsel, R.O.T. After much thought, I decided that a P.R. Agent (even one such as myself) can only go so far with mere spin. Sooner or later, you've got to actually have a product to offer. In this case, our mission to find the Khan has failed on all its promises.

Firstly, even our Captain is now admitting that he lied us into going to outer-space. He never had proof that the Khan was out there.

Secondly, we never actually had any sort of plan from the get-go. Where exactly in outer-space was the Khan supposed to be? Did the Captain even know where he was leading us? Not one of us could honestly answer "yes" to these questions.

Thirdly, in all the time we've been on this mission, we haven't seen a scap of progress. We haven't found the Khan, nor have we found any clues as to his whereabouts. In fact, I would go so far as to say that things have actually got worse for us in terms of national prestige and loss of blood and treasure.

When making an investment, you always have to know when to sell your shares and retreat. Unfortunately, there is the psychological trap known as 'entanglement': the bigger the investment, the more reluctant we are to cut our losses when its value goes down. The bigger the loss, the more we wish to recover that loss through continued investment. But the rational thing to do - when we know the investment is doomed - is to sell up before the losses get any bigger. Start again, remake yourself. I speak from a lifetime of unrivaled success.

And so, with these things in mind, I got out my map of where we were (and where you still are), hired a starship from yonder locals, and promptly made my way back to the Republic of Tinselman. With Angelina.

The weather is fine, Qarl is in hiding, the citizens are malleable as clay.

Best of luck finding Khan Miller!

Yours sincerely,

The Hon. R. Murdoch,
President of the Republic of Tinselman.

[Adam Wilmer]

So... it comes to this...
abandoned by those we once trusted...

As first officer of this expidtion, I'm taking over... anyone who wants to follow me can. For the rest, Earth is several dozen lightyears back that way, 2nd star to the right and straight on till morning...

Either way, I'm not giving up on the Khan.

[william shatner]

I give up... rupert may have the presidency. It's all true.

Oh... Angelina, how could you have abandoned me?! How?!

[Danxia]

Rupey, I think your logical positivist attitude here betrays an inherent empiricist bias.

[Alli]

*tsk tsk,* Rupey! Giving up so quickly? I'm ashamed of you. To think I ever(barely) trusted you. President, my foot!
I for one am not giving up. One does not lightly dive into the fray and then call it quits simply because there is no immediate gratification(aside from a good adrenaline rush). Khan is out there.... somewhere. I'm with you, Wilmey.
Danxia, did you find your way out yet?

[Danxia]

It depends on your definition of "way out" . . .

[Danxia]

Rupey - give Captain Shatner a break will you? Whether by luck or design, this mission HAS, I think, uncovered "clues as to [the Khan's] whereabouts"

It's all there, if you have eyes to see.

[indie]

Wait, both of you! The prisoner is waking up!

[First Lieutenant Cadmere P.]

Um... Excuse me... I was never unconscious. That was self-defense. Possum-mode. And, as the resident hostage of the situation, may I suggest something? Instead of you two lovely females beating the mess out of me, why don't you just ask me where this Khan fellow is? I may not know directly, but I probably could point you in a reasonably sound direction and wave you off. That's a far sight better than you two power-hungry nitpicky flyboys yelling at each other.
Just look at your poor crew. They've trusted you ( I'm assuming), followed you this far (some probably longer than others), and mostly obeyed without question (except for those times when they blatantly refused to budge). Please, captains sirs, let's sit down and have a nice chat about all this before we go blowing each others' brains out - not that anyone has threatened to do that, but it's come pretty dang close.

[Alli]

Danxia- by "way out" I mean: finding a door or other means of exiting said Trompe room, causing oneself to no longer be in one's previous location, and the act of relocating one's person so as to be in a completely different, desired location.

That kind of out.

[Alli]

Cadmere P - so that's your name, huh? You poor, poor kid.

So, you say you don't know where the Khan is, right? We'll see about that. You, my little friend, are going to tell us everything you know. Comprendo?

[Danxia]

Alli - in that case, the answer is 'no'.

Cadmere P. - who are you? And who are the "two power-hungry nitpicky flyboys"? Rupey and . . . ?

[Joelson Carl]

After that breakdown by Captain Shatner, I was temporarily plunged into a terrible depression due to the lack of leadership, and was thus silent.

Luckily and thankfully, First Officer Wilmey has taken over. I choose to continue The Search for Khan under Wilmey's leadership.

Regarding Cadmere P. - Perhaps if we need to interrogate him we could employ the services of Jack Bauer?

[Adam Wilmer]

First things, first, Shat-man and others have continually made comment on the fact that we're severely out of food. Alli, Joelson Carl, can you guys recon and find the troops some goodies? Maybe eggnog, for the holiday season? This search isn't going to last long if we starve to death...

[President Rupert]

Joelson, son, if you can't stand the power vacuum, come back to the ROT!

Anyway... I must advise you that Jack Bauer is a very busy man. No time to spare.

Nevertheless - I can offer you the services of John Yoo.

[Mark]

Interesting bit of trivia . . . anyone remember that old Lucasarts game called The Dig? Apparently in an earlier version of the game it was necessary to gather food in order to survive. But it got too complicated for the designers, so they cut that out of the finished product.

Can you do the same?

[strange man]

excuse me, I'm looking for someone called . . . "indie"